Moving On Up

When I started teacher training, we wrote a list of goals and put them into an envelope. We get them back when we graduate. I love that idea- it's like a time capsule of goals and emotions. I don't remember too much of what I wrote on my card, but I know I was really unhappy when I wrote it. I was in the midst of my blah job and really wishing I was back where I feel like I belong- in school or in a teaching situation. Or out of Boston. You know, whatever.

I know some things have changed. I may not be one hundred percent out of my rut, but I know I'm making progress. Some of the more expensive progress came in the form of the $160 charge on my card for the GRE.

Sherman used to say that he only advised students to go into music if they didn't have a choice. That is, if they absolutely couldn't see any road ahead of them except for music, if music was their only option aside from desperate unhappiness, then music was a good idea.

I haven't been the most driven person in the last few years, and I know that. I haven't even come close to what I feel I could potentially do. It's hard to be in your twenties and getting ready to enter a PhD or DMA program (hopefully!), without any promise that you'll have a job when you exit. I don't think this was the case forty (or even twenty) years ago. But I want to do what I want to do, and I can't see myself doing anything else with or in my life.

So this time, I'm ready.